Bassist Wanted

Comics for musicians

Bassist Wanted

Comics for musicians

Character

Brett the hipster

Brett is a hipster who disowns any band that licenses a song, and Greg‘s roommate. He spent a year avoiding “You’re Beautiful.”

70 comics feature this characterNewest first Most popular Oldest first

Popularity rank 1 #138. No James Blunt at the Subway

August 5, 2006

SUBWAY WORKER: Sir, I asked if you want the meal or just the sandwich.
BRETT: I'M SORRY, I CAN'T HEAR YOU RIGHT NOW.

BRETT: I HAVE TO KEEP MY HANDS ON MY EARS WHILE YOUR INSTORE MUSIC IS PLAYING THIS JAMES BLUNT SONG.
SUBWAY CUSTOMER: What? This "You're Beautiful" song?

SUBWAY WORKER: DENNIS! CAN YOU COME OUT HERE? DENNIS!!
BRETT: I'M TRYING TO AVOID HEARING IT. I'VE HELD OUT FOR A YEAR.
SUBWAY CUSTOMER: It's not so bad. Sorta harmless hooky pop.

SUBWAY WORKER: OK, just... look, I'm charging you for the meal...
BRETT: IT'S SORT OF A "QUEST".
SUBWAY CUSTOMER: Can I have his chips?

5 views 4

Popularity rank 2 #94. Desperate plea

February 1, 2006

GREG: (to robot) Let me out of here! Ow! Quit that! Let— DRM 9000:

GREG: (yelling) BRETT!! Is that you? HELP!! Ow! I'm being held hostage by a Sony DRM robot! It's got me strapped to my chair and it's making me buy CDs, ow, against my will.

GREG: (to robot) Ha, hear that? My roommate's here! Ow! Game over, robot! Ha!

BRETT: This... is not my fight.
GREG: Hey Brett?! You there? BRE-- Ow! It is a REAL BEARD, will you PLEASE quit pulling on it?

1 view 1

Popularity rank 3 #307. Barry and Mega-Tune

November 12, 2009

BARRY: Attention listeners: this radio station will now only play simplified, one-note versions of songs created through a horrifying process called "MEGA-TUNE".

BARRY: You'll grumble, but then submit. As you have to every atrocity during what has become a 40-year march toward the complete homogenization of rock.

BARRY: So... after the break, I'll play all of John Mellancamp's "American Fool", but you'll just hear nine single notes matched with nine semi-patriotic grunts.

BARRY: It's gonna suck, but you deserve it. And I'm BARRY, the HONEST DJ. Back after this...
BRETT: Barry speaks the truth and it hurts so good.

2 views Like

Popularity rank 4 #250. Greg and the Cloud

August 18, 2009

BRETT: Hey Greg. Smita broke up with me. She's dating this guy now, "The Cloud". He's the embodiment of all Internet knowledge.
GREG: OK...

GREG: Why're you're hanging out with her new dude?
BRETT: Well, I want to hate him, but he keeps analyzing me and recommending awesome music.

THE CLOUD: Hello.
GREG: Uh... hi.

THE CLOUD: Based on your greeting I think you might enjoy "Band of Bees".
BRETT: Oh wow, yeah, you really would, Greg.

2 views Like

Popularity rank 5 #226. Britney sacks BreatheHeavy.com

April 3, 2009

GREG: Oh... Em... GEE! Britney fansite BreatheHeavy.com got sent a CEASE AND DESIST letter!!!
BRETT: Do you... often visit Britney Spears fan sites?

GREG: Um, B.H. is only, like, my HOME PAGE!! Haven't you ever noticed BreatheHeavy.com in your Firefox history when I borrow your Mac?

BRETT: Yeah... I just... always figured you were using my laptop for mp3 phone sex porn.

BRETT: I'm weirdly MORE creeped out by THIS.
GREG: BreatheHeavy.com is, like, the FIFTH ESTATE of Spearsian gossip!!!

2 views Like

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The first book, as a PDF

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The first 150 comics: MySpace pages, going on tour, and that James Blunt song. Up for Best Book at the 2009 ECNY Awards. $10.

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