Bassist Wanted

Comics for musicians

Bassist Wanted

Comics for musicians

Bart the evil executive

40 comics feature this characterNewest first Most popular Oldest first

Popularity rank 16 #202. Taking more chances

January 28, 2009

BART: Joel, we need to take more CHANCES at this label.
JOEL: Wow, sir... YES! Let's scour the Web and local clubs for new talent!

BART: We need to give people more OPPORTUNITIES! Find artists who people have COUNTED OUT!
JOEL: YES! I even have some lists here of unsigned bands who-

BART: Joel, we need to give Katharine McPhee a SECOND ALBUM!!

JOEL: Dear God... he... he's got the MCPHEEVER again...
BART: And if necessary a third and fourth one! That girl's GOT something!

1 view Like

Popularity rank 17 #198. Told you so

January 16, 2009

BART: Frank, we're laying you off. The label's in the shitter, largely because we failed to follow your constant advice to embrace online music sharing.

BART: We're not giving you a severance package, but I am willing to let you scream "I told you so" very loudly in my face a few times.
SIMON: OK.

SIMON: I TOLD YOU SO! I TOLD YOU SO! I FUCKING TOLD YOU SO WITH THIS MUSIC SHARING SHIT!

SIMON: Thanks... hey, can I get a letter of recommendation?
BART: Sure thing.

1 view Like

Popularity rank 18 #133. Gordon wants a solo album

July 28, 2006

GORDON CRANWICK: But Kevin got to put out a solo album!
BART: Kevin is the frontman. He's the Rob Thomas of the band.

GORDON CRANWICK: Who the hell am I then?!
BART: You're the Tom Poston of the band.

GORDON CRANWICK: Who the hell's Tom Poston?!
BART: He was on Newhart, Gordon.

GORDON CRANWICK: So what the hell does that mean?
BART: It means "no solo for Gordo." Barbra, is Newhart out on DVD yet?
BARBRA: No, sir.

1 view Like

Popularity rank 19 #76. The Future Is Not In Cloning

November 18, 2005

JOEL: Sir, your friend at GeniTECH has concluded cloning bands to create hits just isn't practical. For one thing, there's a 20-year lag time while the clones mature.

BART: Well... I guess it was sort of crazy, wasn't it? To think the future of music lay in human cloning?
JOEL: Heh... yes, sir.

BART: When clearly, from what you're saying, the future of music lies in a combination of cloning and time travel.

BART: Now, here's a number of a guy I know at Wormhole Depot...
JOEL: Sir, how do you know these people?

1 view Like

Popularity rank 20 #67. The Wrong Approach

November 7, 2005

BART: Joel, it occurs to me... I'm always looking for bands who're similar to existing popular bands. Maybe... it's the
wrong approach.

JOEL: Sir! I've felt this way for years! We need bands that sound
different! New sounds! We-
BART: What? No. No, what we need is more accurate copies.

BART: We need human clones, Joel.

JOEL: Come... come again, sir?
BART: Look, here's a number of a guy I know down at GeniTECH....

1 view Like

Keep reading

Most popular comics…

All Local Bands Suck (Except Ours), the first Bassist Wanted book, open on an iPad

The first book, as a PDF

All Local Bands Suck (Except Ours)

The first 150 strips: MySpace pages, going on tour, and that James Blunt song. Up for Best Book at the 2009 ECNY Awards. $10.

The Roonie the Rabbit cast in a row

Also by Porter Mason

Roonie the Rabbit on Patreon

Join free to get all my latest comics by email, or for $5 a month get exclusive strips and every new comic a week early.

Join the Patreon