Bassist Wanted

Comics for musicians

Bassist Wanted

Comics for musicians

Bart the evil executive

40 comics feature this characterNewest first Most popular Oldest first

Popularity rank 36 #295. A single vord

October 26, 2009

KURT: Vit Mega-Tune, we not only simplify music, but also lyrics.

KURT: Each song reduces to a single vord. Observe.

MEGA-TUNE: AMERICA! LOVE! PENIS!

KURT: Dat was de National Anthem, "Something" by de Beatles und, of course, Aerosmith's "Dude Who Look Like de Lady".
JOEL: Oof.

0 views Like

Popularity rank 37 #293. Extraneous noise

October 19, 2009

KURT: Ve find dat much of a song is extraneous... NOISE, ja? So ve say, "Vhy not shtrip de song of all but de ESSENTIAL bits und pieces?"

KURT: So ve shtrip it down to VON note.
JOEL: ONE note?
BART: ONE note.

KURT: Ja...

KURT: Usually, it's a "C".
JOEL: Dear GOD.
BART: He's gonna save us BILLIONS.

0 views Like

Popularity rank 38 #292. Each day in the industry

October 16, 2009

BART: Joel, each day you work in the music industry, a piece of your soul DIES. It hurts a lot at first, but as time passes, you feel it less and less.

BART: And in a certain amount of time, your soul will diminish to trace amounts and stop being an obstacle to your work.

BART: I call it your "INDUSTRY HALF-LIFE".

JOEL: Are you saying my soul is like... radioactive WASTE, sir?
BART: It's not UNlike it, Joel.

0 views Like

Popularity rank 39 #291. Auto-Tune everything

October 15, 2009

KURT: People LOF Auto-Tune, ja? Dey Auto-Tune T-PAIN... dey Auto-Tune de NEWS... dey Auto-Tune EFERYTINK...

KURT: So I began Auto-Tuning AUTO-TUNE. Den I Auto-Tune Auto-Tuned AUTO-TUNES. I vant to make songs SIMPLER, more PURE, more PERFECT.

JOEL: You want to make songs LIFELESS and COLD and- and UNFEELING!
KURT: JA! EXACTLY!

KURT: VOW, OK... so glad ve see eye-to-EYE on dis...
JOEL: A piece of my soul just died, sir.
BART: Yeah. That'll happen.

0 views Like

Popularity rank 40 #290. Working on Auto-Tune

October 14, 2009

BART: Kurt and his engineers have been working on Auto-Tune.
KURT: I hate Auto-Tune.
JOEL: Me too!

KURT: Auto-Tune DESTROYS music...
BART: Yes.
JOEL: Yes!

KURT: It allows for TOO MUCH VARIABILITY!
BART: Yes!
JOEL: Wait-

KURT: My goal is to make music more homogeneous than Auto-Tune ever could!
BART: YES!!
JOEL: Damn it...

0 views Like

Keep reading

Most popular comics…

All Local Bands Suck (Except Ours), the first Bassist Wanted book, open on an iPad

The first book, as a PDF

All Local Bands Suck (Except Ours)

The first 150 strips: MySpace pages, going on tour, and that James Blunt song. Up for Best Book at the 2009 ECNY Awards. $10.

The Roonie the Rabbit cast in a row

Also by Porter Mason

Roonie the Rabbit on Patreon

Join free to get all my latest comics by email, or for $5 a month get exclusive strips and every new comic a week early.

Join the Patreon