Bassist Wanted

Comics for musicians

Bassist Wanted

Comics for musicians

Bart the evil executive

40 comics feature this characterNewest first Most popular Oldest first

Popularity rank 11 #284. Disrupting the status quo

September 23, 2009

BART: Joel, the economic situation demands we disrupt the status quo here at Hancock Records...
JOEL: Yes?

BART: We've got to ALTER the way we do business! REINVENT ourselves!
JOEL: Yes!

BART: We've got to embrace RADICAL CHANGE, Joel!
JOEL: Yes! YES!

BART: We've got to find ways to SCREW our artists more than we ever thought possible!
JOEL: (thinking) SO close...

1 view Like

Popularity rank 12 #283. That last band

September 22, 2009

BART: I liked that last band you played. Who was that?
JOEL: Oh, no, that wasn't a band, that was just my phone ringing.

BART: Well, I LIKE it! What's it called?
JOEL: Uh... "marimba"?

BART: "Marimba"... I LIKE it... skews very LATIN... Let's sign them!

JOEL: (thinking) Sign WHO?
BART: I also like that TONE our voicemail system makes... sign that guy, too!

1 view Like

Popularity rank 13 #282. This song isn’t catching

September 21, 2009

BART: I can't believe this song isn't CATCHING... we got it in that GEICO ad... two movie TRAILERS... we did that MOUNTAIN DEW promotion... (sigh)...

JOEL: Was it a… a GOOD song, sir?
BART: Oh God no… No, no, it's a dreadful little song.

BART: But it had such SYNERGY…

JOEL: Well… They can't all be the Black Eyed Peas, sir.
BART: Would that they could, Joel… (sigh) Would that they could…

1 view Like

Popularity rank 14 #211. We’re artists

February 16, 2009

BOY BAND DUDE: We're ARTISTS!
BART: You're a boy band.
BOY BAND DUDE: We WON'T make ringtones!

BART: You're under contract.
BOY BAND DUDE: To make MUSIC!
BART: Ringtones ARE music.

BOY BAND DUDE: We have IDEALS!
BART: You have sex tapes.
BOY BAND DUDE: Sex tapes... launch CAREERS!

BART: Not sex tapes with old, hairy Cincinnati pretzel vendors.
BOY BAND DUDE: We're... ARTISTS...

1 view Like

Popularity rank 15 #207. Human slavery

February 10, 2009

BART: Joel, can we... sell all our musicians into human slavery?
JOEL: Legally? Yes.

JOEL: They're under very, VERY exploitative contracts.

JOEL: But, ah, morally speaking, we probably... shouldn't.
BART: Yes, I suppose that's right.

BART: What if it's just the trance artists?

1 view Like

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Most popular comics…

All Local Bands Suck (Except Ours), the first Bassist Wanted book, open on an iPad

The first book, as a PDF

All Local Bands Suck (Except Ours)

The first 150 strips: MySpace pages, going on tour, and that James Blunt song. Up for Best Book at the 2009 ECNY Awards. $10.

The Roonie the Rabbit cast in a row

Also by Porter Mason

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