Bassist Wanted

Comics for musicians

Bassist Wanted

Comics for musicians

Joel the naive A&R guy

60 comics feature this characterNewest first Most popular Oldest first

Popularity rank 31 #202. Taking more chances

January 28, 2009

BART: Joel, we need to take more CHANCES at this label.
JOEL: Wow, sir... YES! Let's scour the Web and local clubs for new talent!

BART: We need to give people more OPPORTUNITIES! Find artists who people have COUNTED OUT!
JOEL: YES! I even have some lists here of unsigned bands who-

BART: Joel, we need to give Katharine McPhee a SECOND ALBUM!!

JOEL: Dear God... he... he's got the MCPHEEVER again...
BART: And if necessary a third and fourth one! That girl's GOT something!

1 view Like

Popularity rank 32 #136. Summer intern’s first task

August 4, 2006

JOEL: So, welcome to Hancock Records. Your first project this summer is helping me brainstorm ways to sneak loopholes in our musician's contracts.

JOEL: Now, so far we've tried invisible ink, 1pt fonts, hidden rebuses....
INTERN: But this is... I... I wanted to work here because I love music and musicians.

INTERN: I... don't feel so well....

JOEL: Hey, Tim. We've... got another intern going Code 32 in the 18th floor bathroom.
OTHERTIM: God damn it... (sigh) OK. I'll get a mop.

1 view Like

Popularity rank 33 #76. The Future Is Not In Cloning

November 18, 2005

JOEL: Sir, your friend at GeniTECH has concluded cloning bands to create hits just isn't practical. For one thing, there's a 20-year lag time while the clones mature.

BART: Well... I guess it was sort of crazy, wasn't it? To think the future of music lay in human cloning?
JOEL: Heh... yes, sir.

BART: When clearly, from what you're saying, the future of music lies in a combination of cloning and time travel.

BART: Now, here's a number of a guy I know at Wormhole Depot...
JOEL: Sir, how do you know these people?

1 view Like

Popularity rank 34 #67. The Wrong Approach

November 7, 2005

BART: Joel, it occurs to me... I'm always looking for bands who're similar to existing popular bands. Maybe... it's the
wrong approach.

JOEL: Sir! I've felt this way for years! We need bands that sound
different! New sounds! We-
BART: What? No. No, what we need is more accurate copies.

BART: We need human clones, Joel.

JOEL: Come... come again, sir?
BART: Look, here's a number of a guy I know down at GeniTECH....

1 view Like

Popularity rank 35 #40. Big fan at a record label

September 20, 2005

JOEL: Hi, this is Joel Dever with Hancock Records. Is this Stony from the Humble Bees?
STONY: (silent)

JOEL: Wow, can I just say, I am such a big fan, my first kiss was actually in the backseat of a Jetta listening to "She's a L'il Kinda Mine".

JOEL: Ha, yeah, the biggest... so... anyway....

JOEL: I'm sort of calling to inform you that my label's filing a cease and desist order against you guys....

1 view Like

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The two Bassist Wanted paperbacks, All Local Bands Suck (Except Ours) and Jingles Are the New Punk

Bassist Wanted, in print

300 Comics, Two Books

All Local Bands Suck (Except Ours) and Jingles Are the New Punk, with their PDFs. $25 for both, shipped by me.

The Roonie the Rabbit cast in a row

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