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Bassist Wanted

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Bassist Wanted

Comics for musicians

Bassist Wanted
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Character

Tony King the agent

30 comics feature this characterNewest firstMost popularOldest first

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Popularity rank 21 #122. Coaxing Gordon to play

March 22, 2006

AGENT: Gordon, come out of there, buddy. The show starts in a half hour.
GORDON CRANWICK: NO way, man. Not unless we play some of my songs.
AGENT: No, look, Kevin's got some of yours in here...
GORDON CRANWICK: KEVIN put ONE of my songs, BURIED in the middle of the set, and KEVIN can go FUCK himself.
AGENT: Gordon, (sigh)... I dunno, look, what if I arrange for the camera guy to... CONCENTRATE on you a little more than usual?
GORDON CRANWICK: How "concentrated" are we talking?
AGENT: 65% of head shots, Gordon, 100% of two shots, now put some pants on....

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Popularity rank 22 #121. Soundcheck in Chicago

March 20, 2006

AGENT: You have 20 minutes for soundcheck. Where's Gordon?
KEVIN EDO: Gordon's not coming.
PETER WELD: Where will the water be? And snacks?
AGENT: Water behind the bass amp. Hummus and pitas by the scaffolding. What? Where is he, Kevin?
KEVIN EDO: Dunno. Don't care. Don't need him.
PETER WELD: Oooo, hummus....
AGENT: I'll find Gordon, you guys see how things sound.
KEVIN EDO: HELLO, HELLO. GO FUCK YOURSELF, CHICAGO.
PETER WELD: Hey, nice screen, we got the JVC.
KEVIN EDO: HEH, I'M JUST KIDDING, CHICAGO. PETER, YOU... GOT HUMMUS ON YOUR EAR.
PETER WELD: Whoop, so I do. Good eye....

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Popularity rank 23 #118. Picking an opening band

March 13, 2006

AGENT: Here's who's available for an opening band: Clap Your Hands Say Yeah, Giant Drag, the Futureheads and the Subways.
KEVIN EDO: They're good, right? And all rock?
KEVIN EDO: I won't have our fans sit through 45 minutes of noise.
AGENT: They're all good. All rock. Just need you to pick one. Here's their albums, you can listen and--
KEVIN EDO: Any of 'em have hot chicks?
AGENT: Well... I guess Giant Drag has--
KEVIN EDO: OK, them then, "Giant Drug." Hey, is the guitar-shaped Sealy on the tour bus yet?

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Popularity rank 24 #117. Peter won’t play Boston

March 10, 2006

AGENT: So then you guys'll play Boston.
PETER WELD: No! We DON'T play Boston!
KEVIN EDO: Last tour, we ate Thai food in Boston.
GORDON CRANWICK: Peter ordered Pad Kee Mao.
PETER WELD: I asked for it MILD!
KEVIN EDO: They made it too spicy.
AGENT: Why didn't you just send it back?
GORDON CRANWICK: Peter doesn't send back food.
KEVIN EDO: So Jumpstart Malady won't play Boston.
GORDON CRANWICK: So Peter won't play Boston.
AGENT: OK... OK, well, no Boston.
AGENT: So next is New Haven....
PETER WELD: HA! No WAY I play New Haven!
KEVIN EDO: Last tour, we went bowling in New Haven.
GORDON CRANWICK: Peter rolled an 8-10 split.

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Popularity rank 25 #115. Practicing for the tour

March 6, 2006

AGENT: OK, tour starts Friday. Now, you all won't actually be playing your instruments. We'll be piping in the music.
AGENT: But your hands need to look like they're moving along with the recordings.
KEVIN EDO: What, like those mechanical bears at Chuck E. Cheese?
AGENT: If that helps you, sure.
GORDON CRANWICK: Jesus, we don't need to rehearse that, Anth. We know--
PETER WELD: C'mon! Let's just go! One! Two! Thr--
PETER WELD: Wait, hold on.... Dropped my sticks....
GORDON CRANWICK: I stand corrected.
AGENT: Maybe we'll just project video of you guys playing.

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Keep reading

Most popular comics…

  • 1 JOHN: It's like, she was such a huge part of my life, so it's not just like my girlfriend left me, but my whole life.

    After the breakup

    2 1 Apr 5, ’05

  • 2 SUBWAY WORKER: Sir, I asked if you want the meal or just the sandwich.
BRETT: I'M SORRY, I CAN'T HEAR YOU RIGHT NOW.

    No James Blunt at the Subway

    1 3 Aug 5, ’06

  • 3 DAN: So let's say I have this cute young guitar student... she's not even THAT young... is it... I mean... is it cool for a teacher to ask out a student?

    Teacher/student

    0 6 May 12, ’08

  • 4 SCRAPPER: Get your manager. I need someone who UNDERSTANDS arts and crafts.
JOHN: I GET art, lady. I AM an artist.

    I am an artist

    0 4 Mar 13, ’10

  • 5 PETER: Well, for what it's worth, I think adopting that hot 19-year-old orphan was, though CREEPY, sort of NOBLE.

    Creepy but noble

    0 3 Apr 30, ’10

All Local Bands Suck (Except Ours), the first Bassist Wanted book, open on an iPad

The first book, as a PDF

All Local Bands Suck (Except Ours)

The first 150 strips: MySpace pages, going on tour, and that James Blunt song. Up for Best Book at the 2009 ECNY Awards. $10.

Get the PDF→

The Roonie the Rabbit cast in a row

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Bassist Wanted

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