Bassist Wanted

Comics for musicians

Bassist Wanted

Comics for musicians

Dan the naive guitarist

89 comics feature this characterNewest first Most popular Oldest first

Popularity rank 41 #152. Contest For New Bands

September 25, 2006

JOHN: So guys: gig this Friday. A contest for new bands.
CHRISTINA: We've been a band for 8 years, John.

JOHN: We've got to bring 10 people, so plug this bitch.
RONI: A bringer show? Jesus....
DAN: How much money is the prize?

JOHN: The prize, Dan, is a whole lot of the most valuable currency in the music business: EXPOSURE.

RONI: And of course, the title of "City's Most Gullible Band".
JOHN: Oh, hey, the entry fee's $150, so... pony up.

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Popularity rank 42 #131. The Eliminator

July 24, 2006

DAN: So the chorus is E, then A, then "The Eliminator."
JOHN: "The Eliminator."

DAN: Yeah, it's a new chord I invented.
JOHN: How do you know it's new?

DAN: Well, it's not in the book.
JOHN: The little laminated pamphlet that came with your guitar? C'mon: be professional about this shit, Dan.

JOHN: You have to look on Wikipedia, too.
DAN: Anyway... then it's E, Bminor, "The Buzzard's Gambit," and back to E.

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Popularity rank 43 #130. The Ninth Encore

July 21, 2006

DAN: Hey... the first encore was pretty good, right?
JOHN: Oh sure. Our acoustic cover of "War Pigs" was transcen-friggin'-dental.

DAN: The ninth encore was a little much though, huh?
JOHN: Hard to say.

(The lights go out.)

DAN: I mean, I sort of liked playing with the house lights on.
JOHN: Hey, when d'you think someone'll be back to unlock the place? Noon?

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Popularity rank 44 #128. Putting Names In A Love Song

July 17, 2006

DAN: I dunno, John. I think if you're writing a song about someone you love, you gotta put her name in the song.
JOHN: Yeah.

JOHN: Man, but NOTHING rhymes with "Goldfrapp."

A pause.

DAN: "Mole... plaque"?
JOHN: Slant rhymes are for pussies, Dan.

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Popularity rank 45 #111. Shutting off the MySpace page

February 24, 2006

JOHN: OK, band meeting. I'm shutting off our MySpace account.
RONI: Thank GOD.

JOHN: It was tearing the Ambulance Men apart. And distracting us from more important things.
RONI: Like, actually practicing ever?

JOHN: Also... this 15-year-old sent us a... photo of herself, and I got really creeped out.

DAN: What was she--
JOHN: I don't wanna talk about it.
CHRISTINA: MySpace IS creepy... feels like the whole site's covered with a clear, sticky film....

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All Local Bands Suck (Except Ours), the first Bassist Wanted book, open on an iPad

The first book, as a PDF

All Local Bands Suck (Except Ours)

The first 150 strips: MySpace pages, going on tour, and that James Blunt song. Up for Best Book at the 2009 ECNY Awards. $10.

The Roonie the Rabbit cast in a row

Also by Porter Mason

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