Bassist Wanted

Comics for musicians

Bassist Wanted

Comics for musicians

Storyline

Buying a Guitar

Dan attempts to go to a guitar and buy a guitar without going into six-figures of debt.

10 stripsFrom the beginning Most popular

#172. Out of tune

September 17, 2008

DAN: Oh hey, before we get started, my guitar's out of tune.

JOHN: OK.

JOHN: So... you gonna start tuning it?
DAN: Oh no, that'd take me hours.

DAN: I was just sorta giving a heads up that I'm gonna sound shitty.

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#173. Audience hate = respect

September 18, 2008

JOHN: ...and if you get another guitar, we can even do the thing where we make the audience wait while you switch them.

DAN: Don't they hate that?
JOHN: Audience golden rule: what they HATE, they RESPECT.

DAN: Even that night at Rockwood? That was all... respect.
JOHN: Oh, totally. TOTAL respect.

DAN: Even that old handicapped woman?
JOHN: Well, yeah, you gotta, y'know, read between the fistfights.

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#174. Low sales resistance

September 19, 2008

DAN: I found the guitar I want online. I sorta wanna buy it in person, but... I haven't been to a store in 5 years.
RONI: Really, why?

DAN: Look around my room, Roni. I have LOW SALES RESISTANCE.
RONI: That does explain why you needlessly own a SEALY POSTURPEDIC.

DAN: No, it explains why that is one of FOUR Posturpedics I own.

RONI: Where do-
DAN: I store the rest in a rat-infested timeshare I bought in rural Alabama.

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#175. Getting psyched up

September 22, 2008

RONI: So you gonna let this guitar salesperson PUSH YOU AROUND?
DAN: Aw HELL no! I'M gonna be runnin' this conversation, bitches!

RONI: And you're not gonna bend over and pay STICKER PRICE, are you?
DAN: Damn STRAIGHT! I'm gonna be negotiatin' that fucktard until he meets MY price!

A pause.

DAN: Though to be quite honest, I've heard this kind of tough talk outta me before.

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#176. Won’t be distracted

October 6, 2008

RONI: OK, you're here to buy a Fender Standard Strat. NOTHING ELSE. You're on a budget. You won't be upsold or DISTRACTED.
DAN: RIGHT!

DAN: Ooo, that one in the window's nice though... Wonder how much...

RONI: Which one?
DAN: That big, blue GLOWING one...

RONI: That's a NEON SIGN, Dan! Keep it together, man!!
DAN: Still... wouldn't hurt to ASK...

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