Bassist Wanted

Comics for musicians

Bassist Wanted

Comics for musicians

Roni the jaded guitarist

66 comics feature this characterNewest first Most popular Oldest first

Popularity rank 21 #230. What’s that called?

April 9, 2009

COREY BROWN: Hey, you sounded great up there. What was that called?

RONI: Well, my guitar solo used a scale called the Hungarian Minor (or Harmonic Minor #4). It has a large number of half steps and a slightly ambiguous tonal center.

COREY BROWN: I just sort of meant, "What's the name of the song?"
RONI: Oh.

RONI: I have no idea.

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Popularity rank 22 #218. Under the table

March 10, 2009

DAN: I don't get why we had to incorporate the band. Why pay taxes at ALL?
RONI: You don't cut corners on stuff like this, Dan. There're RULES for a REASON.

DAN: But If we ever get money from a gig, it's all UNDER THE TABLE anyway... Why declare it? Who CARES? Who's the VICTIM?

A pause.

DAN: Roni, you're looking at me like I stabbed a pregnant woman.
RONI: THE VICTIMS ARE THE AMERICAN TAXPAYERS, DANIEL!!!

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Popularity rank 23 #217. Corporate card

March 9, 2009

DAN: HEY... new mic!
JOHN: Sweet, right? I put it on our new CORPORATE CARD.

RONI: John... we incorporated the band to SAVE money, you jackass.
JOHN: Roni, you just don't understand ECONOMICS.

JOHN: This is like the STIMULUS PACKAGE. I'm INVESTING in the band NOW to allow us-

RONI: Give me the American Express, John, or I will throw this out the window.
JOHN: Dan! STOP HER! Our nation's infrastructure is CRUMBLING!

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Popularity rank 24 #214. Roni’s annual review

March 4, 2009

JOHN: OK, NAME: Roni Videtta... official TITLE: lead guitarist...
RONI: John, I'm not doing an annual review. We're not a real company.

JOHN: So we'll be evaluating you in several categories, OK?
RONI: We just made the band a corporation to save money on taxes.

JOHN: First: "TECHNICAL PROFICIENCY". I have you down for a 4 out of 5.
RONI: I put up with enough stuff like this at my day job, so-

RONI: I would argue I'm at LEAST a 4.5.
JOHN: Next up... "SHOWING CLEAVAGE AT SHOWS", an area you could really improve in...

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Popularity rank 25 #213. Calling human resources

March 3, 2009

SCOTT THE LAWYER: ...and then sign here.
RONI: OK.
SCOTT THE LAWYER: OK... Your band is now incorporated.

JOHN: I CALL HUMAN RESOURCES!

RONI: No, there's no "calling" and there's no human-
JOHN: Standard shotgun rules, Roni. Your lawyer here can back me up.

JOHN: Now, first thing I'd like to do is broach the subject of annual reviews.
RONI: Can you un-notarize this?
SCOTT THE LAWYER: No.

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The first 150 strips: MySpace pages, going on tour, and that James Blunt song. Up for Best Book at the 2009 ECNY Awards. $10.

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