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Bassist Wanted

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Bassist Wanted

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Character

Dan the naive guitarist

89 comics feature this characterNewest firstMost popularOldest first

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Popularity rank 71 #27. The day job is taking over your life

June 14, 2005

JOHN: You're skipping band practice? I'm starting to think this "day job" is becoming a career, Dan!
DAN: John, I work at Kinko's. It's not a career, dude....
JOHN: You just have fun in this life you've chosen, Dan. Enjoy your "job"! And your "comfort"! Your "picket fences" and "minivans"!
DAN: It's one practice, John!
DAN: Whatever, man, look, you still want me to pass along your resume?
JOHN: Yes I do!
JOHN: And maybe make a few copies on that cool marbled paper, too....
DAN: You officially now owe my, like, a billion dollars, by the way....

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Popularity rank 72 #26. The show was good or horrible

June 7, 2005

JOHN: No way! It was a horrible show! We messed up 3 of 4 songs!
DAN: But we got free drinks, John! 2 each! And they were totally strong, too.
JOHN: Dan, man, the acoustics in there made us sound like a God damn jug band....
DAN: But there were people there, man. Almost 15! 2 of 'em were even girls!
JOHN: That did not go unnoticed, dude. The chickfactor was huge.
DAN: I winked at one of them, but that was right before I fell off trhe stage.
JOHN: Yeah, that was more unfortunate. You need to be more aware of your amp, dude....
DAN: Still, she helped me back up. Definite vibe-age.

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Popularity rank 73 #23. When do we get to be rock stars?

May 17, 2005

JOHN: We've played clubs around here for years. We've paid our stupid dues. Where's our record deal? Where's our groupies? When do we get to be rock stars?
DAN: I got recognized by a waitress at Denny's last night.
JOHN: Yeah? You get the food for free?
DAN: No. But I felt like she gave me more little jelly packets than normal.
JOHN: Too much jelly. OK... OK, sure. "Decadence." See that's rock star, dude.
DAN: And she was, like, super quick with our free refills, too.

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Popularity rank 74 #22. Getting approached after the show

May 10, 2005

JOHN: I always wanted someone to come up after a show and say, "Your songs really moved me."
DAN: Yeah, or like, "You looked hot up there."
JOHN: "Your lyrics... they're like poetry... sweet, sweet poetry."
DAN: "The way you move up there, it just... drove me crazy."
JOHN: "You're the most exciting songwriter of our generation!!"
DAN: "Daniel Lepp, I wanna ride you like Space Mountain!!"
RONI: What's, ah..... What's up, guys?
DAN: H-hey, Roni, I, uh... look I'll be right back, OK?
JOHN: "You! Not Conor Oberst! Not #@*?ing Conor Oberst!!"

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Popularity rank 75 #21. Mom at practice

May 3, 2005

MOM: Knock knock! Hi gang! Who wants a cookie?
JOHN: Mom! We are rehearsing! I told you not to bug us! Come on!
MOM: OK, OK, I'm sorry, honey, I'm sorry. I'm already gone, OK? Forget I'm here. Call me if you need more cookies....
MOM: Oh, and Daniel-honey, you keep coming into the bridge a half-step slow.
DAN: Really?
JOHN: Dan, man... just ignore her.
RONI: (silent)
CHRISTINA: (silent)

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Most popular comics…

  • 1 JOHN: It's like, she was such a huge part of my life, so it's not just like my girlfriend left me, but my whole life.

    After the breakup

    2 1 Apr 5, ’05

  • 2 SUBWAY WORKER: Sir, I asked if you want the meal or just the sandwich.
BRETT: I'M SORRY, I CAN'T HEAR YOU RIGHT NOW.

    No James Blunt at the Subway

    1 3 Aug 5, ’06

  • 3 DAN: So let's say I have this cute young guitar student... she's not even THAT young... is it... I mean... is it cool for a teacher to ask out a student?

    Teacher/student

    0 6 May 12, ’08

  • 4 SCRAPPER: Get your manager. I need someone who UNDERSTANDS arts and crafts.
JOHN: I GET art, lady. I AM an artist.

    I am an artist

    0 4 Mar 13, ’10

  • 5 PETER: Well, for what it's worth, I think adopting that hot 19-year-old orphan was, though CREEPY, sort of NOBLE.

    Creepy but noble

    0 3 Apr 30, ’10

All Local Bands Suck (Except Ours), the first Bassist Wanted book, open on an iPad

The first book, as a PDF

All Local Bands Suck (Except Ours)

The first 150 strips: MySpace pages, going on tour, and that James Blunt song. Up for Best Book at the 2009 ECNY Awards. $10.

Get the PDF→

The Roonie the Rabbit cast in a row

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Bassist Wanted

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