Bassist Wanted

Comics for musicians

Bassist Wanted

Comics for musicians

Kurt von Einfache the minimalist engineer

16 comics feature this characterNewest first Most popular Oldest first

Popularity rank 6 #313. The Holy Grail

November 20, 2009

KURT: GRAPEFRUIT! PHOSPHORESCENCE! CARDIGAN! There. I just wrote three new one-note songs.
BART: This is the life, eh Joel?

BART: We've found the HOLY GRAIL...

BART: We figured out how the music industry can make MONEY again...

BART: All we had to do was remove the MUSICIANS.

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Popularity rank 7 #312. Writing new one-note songs

November 19, 2009

MEGA-TUNE: Motherlover.
KURT: Und dat's the Mega-Tune version of "Ave Maria".

BART: The great thing about Mega-Tune is once consumers are trained to like it, we can stop using existing stuff and just create new one-note songs.

BART: Kurt, sing him the gem you wrote this morning.
KURT: OATMEAL!

KURT: I mean, you know, I'm still playing vit it.
JOEL: Haunting.
BART: Ooo. I like that. Did you just write that, Joel?

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Popularity rank 8 #310. Blink-182 Mega-Tuned

November 17, 2009

JOEL: Does every album devolve into a song when you Mega-Tune it?
KURT: No, but dey all reveal sometink about the artist. Fur example...

MEGA-TUNE: Nasal. Nasal. Nasal. Nasal. Nasal. Nasal. Nasal. Nasal. Nasal. Nasal. Nasal. Nasal. Nasal. Nasal. Nasal. Nasal.

KURT: Dat's Mega-Tunes of the entire BLINK-182 catalog.

JOEL: Well... they're very... CONSISTENT.
KURT: Ja, und I STOPPED it... I mean, it goes on like dat fur HOURS.

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Popularity rank 9 #309. Abbey Road Mega-Tuned

November 16, 2009

KURT: Vhen de Mega-Tune simplifies albums to one note and word per song, it often reveals bizarre patterns.

KURT: Fur example, dis is all of ABBEY ROAD, back to back...

MEGA-TUNE: Come. My. Lady. You're. My. Pretty. Baby. I'll. Make. Your. Legs. Shake. You. Make. Me. Go. Crazy.

JOEL: That's... that's Crazy Town.
KURT: Ja. Ja, it IS crazytown.

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Popularity rank 10 #297. Memorable

October 28, 2009

JOEL: Well, sir, screwing songwriters aside... if we reduce songs to a single word and note, won't consumers... not... like that?

BART: On the contrary, studies show consumers favor songs with simple, memorable melodies and lyrics.

MEGA-TUNE: FELLATIO!

BART: And you can't get simpler or more memorable than that, Joel!
KURT: Dat vas Little Vayne. "Lollipop".

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The two Bassist Wanted paperbacks, All Local Bands Suck (Except Ours) and Jingles Are the New Punk

Bassist Wanted, in print

300 Comics, Two Books

All Local Bands Suck (Except Ours) and Jingles Are the New Punk, with their PDFs. $25 for both, shipped by me.

The Roonie the Rabbit cast in a row

Also by Porter Mason

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